Woody

"Want to feel fat? Take a moment to feel the underside of your seat..."

"Have you misplaced something? Check with con-ops on the first floor, by the ballrooms!"

"Have a computer that needs fixing? Bring it by!"

"Do NOT forget your Season Pass at home... A replacement costs $15."

"If you're looking for cheap goods, formerly made by Americans, but now outsourced to China, this is the place to go!"

"Bring cash, they don't take credit. (There is however, an ATM inside.)"