Gene Chang

"Thank you, AutoZone, for being open until 9pm on a Sunday. It's not the 10pm of the N. Tryon store, but I'll take it. (And my 6 feet of 1/4" fuel line.)"

"Needed a battery. Had it picked out and ready to check out in literally 60 seconds. Unfortunately, it took 15 minutes to check out the ONE guy ahead of me."

"Stop in on your birthday for a free eclair. Chocolate, or...that other flavor they come in."

"My first time here with absolutely no line. Pro tip: apparently, 5:30pm on a Wednesday is the magic number. And now, you know."

"Waiting in line to return hardware is asinine."

"What happened to the old Hardees checkpoint?!"