Thomas Jenner

"Cashpoint on ground floor close to main entrance. Past the League of Fiends shops and on your right. It doesn't charge."

"Burgers made to order on Mondays. Easssy."

"Blue pls fix gargz"

"Avoid queues by announcing that you are 'here to borrow an inordinate amount of money'."

"Fast trains to London normally depart from platform 3 but they all stop at Chelmsford which is a pain. Walk down the platform a few carriage lengths to avoid the crowds at the back of the train."

"Sampling the draft Amstel now. Not half bad as far as Amstel in London and the South East goes."