Neil Hildebrant

"Barnacle Bill's? More like Buffalo Bob's. You're more likely to get a road flare shoved up your bunghole than fast, friendly service. Btw, bill is an asshole. He coughed up a 1/2 lb lung burger."

"The essence of my swampy buttfuck factory. It brings tears to the eyes of the weak and morbidly obese. Every jiggle of my jowels, from every giggle, from every taco chili gut bomb, makes me pee."

"I come here to fart a lot. That's about it."

"Always leaves my butthole smiling at the end of a long night."

"This place is a pivotal hot spot for our community. I feel like it'll bring a lot of new life to the old town that we love so much. Great work fellas!!"

"Love it or leave it, this place always makes my asshole cry disgusting greasy tears, while my roids burn to a crisp."