Owen Stiffler

"This is all I can think of while here."

"Pippen's Poon Palace, where you come for the deep fryer and leave with a hangover."

"WEEEELLLLCOOOOOMMEE"

"I weirdly feel like committing suicide."

"If you gave me a mound of cheese balls, I'd bathe in them."

"Drink a polar pop, smoke a Black & Mild, and eat a whopper."