Michael Holodnak

"Apparently they squirt lemon into your water without asking"

"I am a leaf on the wind, watch how I soar!"

"Beef brisket. No bun. You're welcome."

"They make their own ice cream here. Its the only place I've ever seen mint ice cream with a chocolate base. If you can't decide and that's available, ORDER IT."

"There are kittehs, please keep the screen doors closed."

"Please be courteous and not have conversations about bodily functions in a public place such as a laundromat."