Ian G

"Don't come with a low cell battery. Signal is shit and there is a dearth of outlets."

"Don't stay up drinking until an hour before your flight and expect a peachy trip. You're welcome."

"You'll never get a death jar, so don't even try."

"Big-ass Jenga? Done."

"Don't lose your driver's license."

"Try their beer, it's so damn bubbly."