Mike Hammer

"What a shitty mayor"

"Great renovation. Gift shop is addicting. Snake River beers on tap. Comfy leather couches by the fire. Dyson airblades in the bathroom. And if they have it get the spicy chicken quesadilla, delicious"

"if your gonna take a dump do us all a favor and go to the basement"

"Fries and green goddess and a milkshake for breakfast"

"Tell Tom to cut his hair"

"dont bring your sweatshirt, you'll have pit stains when you take it off"