Donald Pierce

"Apparently "Eligible for Early Upgrade" means that you are eligible to pay an extra $250 (similar to your contract break fee) and sign up for a new contract..."

"We're currently third on the wait list for help, and we've been watching these 3 employees standing around talking to each other for several minutes, completely ignoring the customers in the store..."

"Staffed by relapsing tweekers that can't wrap a burrito for shit! Manager couldn't figure out how to ring up my order...go anywhere else!"

"Get your blood drawn by Gregory or Holly, they are amazing! You don't even feel it!"

"Punch Krang in the face!"