Avril Hughes

"Nice bit of vomit at the bottom of the steps this morning, someone had too much fun last night!"

"Whatever you do, try not to strike up conversation with Sally, she will give you a nickname that you don't like and then proceed to unload all her worldly wisdom on you"

"$9 roast chicken rice yah"

"look out for a myriad of flying wasps and dragonflies hovering around the outdoor lap pool, THEY WANT STING YOU!"