Andrew Roudebush

"Be sure to pick up a sweet Confederate States of America sweatshirt (and matching floor length Tee for the Mrs.) along with the latest issue of Peach, and you'll be about set."

"This is the saddest place in Brandon, for sure! Come for the service, but stay for the shitty microwaved food, you will regret it."

"Tip one: don't die. Tip two: try the cafeteria's Mac and Cheese, it's to die for."