Grimly Fiendish

"Within the pages in the books in this store, the tools of free thought abound. Buy a book and read it."

"Never, ever order skates or related items from here. The management's incompetence cannot be overstated."

"Honestly, the only way to improve their Tres Leches is to eat it *during* sexy time."

"Try all the things. Everything is good here."

"Dos Gatos, I love you. Will you turn the music down a little bit?"

"Put up with the rude service and you'll be rewarded with the best old-school BBQ in town. Oh, bring cash and don't try to eat their Rib Sandwich like a sandwich."